Thursday, November 22, 2007

Was I this immature?

I have this neighbor, she's 18. She lives with her boyfriend, brother and two other guys. One of the guys, A, I'm convinced wants to be with her even though he's on and off with the mother of his baby. J (my neighbor) and A work together. Her brother doesn't have a job, her boyfriend, F, just started a job and the other guy is rarely there, so I'm not sure if he has a job.

Well J tends to confide in me (as does A.) J came over today and said she'd taken a pregnancy test...3. Two were positive, one was negative. She went to her gyno yesterday and the test was positive, but they were unable to detect anything on an ultrasound.

So this afternoon, she rode with me to get my paycheck and I bought her a pregnancy test and had her take it. It came back negative. Now I've had some false positives in my past experiences, so I wasn't surprised either way.

She told me that F said if she was pregnant, they could give the baby to his parents and the baby would never know otherwise. This tells me, that even though he's adult enough to play, he's not adult enough to be responsible. I was completely appalled by this. That's the mom and adult in me. She said she would never get an abortion and when I brought up adoption, she asked if we wanted the baby. It was said so nonchallantly that I was taken aback. I said, I would gladly adopt, but that we couldn't afford it. I informed her that there were so many couples out there that cannot have children and wanting to adopt.

Given their attitudes and ages, I pray the test she took today is true and she learns something about birth control from this.

I became pregnant with Jay when I was 19. I was told I would not be able to have children due to PID. So it was quite a surprise when I learned I was pregnant. Never once did I think of any option other than having him. I was even willing to do it by myself. But I was not going to just give up. And abortion was NEVER an option. I just don't understand young people anymore. Things that are so important seem so blase' to them.

1 comment:

Ami said...

Oh good grief.

What a sad life that poor kid has going on. Sad thing is, you can't help someone like that until they're ready to be helped.

It's good she has someone to talk to, I hope you have a chance to be a good influence on her.